"Without a connection with myself, my heart, I was creating a barrier to the energy fields around me"
There are many blogs, articles, and research around how to set goals, to manifest your dreams, how selfcare is important and essential for your wellbeing holistically. But what if you are doing all these things but you still just feel empty, that your desire is always out of reach, that you don’t suit the modern society and the perfect life that is portrayed?
In the past few weeks, I have experienced a few challenges and I wanted to share with you, my reflections.
Divine realisation
When building up a business and client base you research, follow guidance, you meditate and start with defining your purpose and passion. I overcame my fears, set up a website, blog post, and even a podcast, I started my journey not really knowing how it would evolve. Yet, deep down in my heart I felt something was amiss. Where were the flow of clients, the feel of joy and positivity? I believe in myself and believe that I will be successful but an ache in my heart still prodded.
Continuing daily with my personal development, I came across a spiritual recording, delivered by a luminary, sharing their wisdom and in that moment, I experienced a true moment of divine realisation as to why I was not progressing to where I wanted to be.
Without a connection with myself, my heart, I was creating a barrier to the energy fields around me.
Reflecting I was scared because that meant giving up control and going deeper into the unknown. The control had kept me safe so far in my life.
Without the connection, I could not receive the guidance, the openness and regardless how much Chakra Balancing, meditations I performed, I was preventing the right people to cross my paths, I was closing my mind to receiving inspiration and creativity and new opportunities to grow my business, through offering different services.
This realisation stopped me in my tracks and my focus became how to love myself and connect with my heart. This journey will be long and will never end but what I found is just by having that acknowledgement, starting with small affirmations, looking myself in the mirror, heart grounding each day my world has started to open, and opportunities and support is coming from areas that I never would have considered.
I felt calmer, more reflective, started to build better relationships, and having “real conversations”. I developed a huge awareness of how I am talking to myself and how negative comments reduced my energy and the feeling of overwhelm crept in and procrastination
My Son's Journey is different
My experience has not been as intense as my son’s journey. He started secondary school last year and he is different, he has Noonam Syndrome, he looks different, but he is intelligent, loving individual and he does have many great talents and qualities. When he is in environments outside of school, where he is loved and accepted, he smiles and his eyes light up and joyous. His creativity comes out and our connection is strong, we feel safe with each other to share emotions, work through challenges, and enjoy life and weekends.
Yet, he is bullied, and he is not accepted by everyone at school.
He has done many things, made wrong choices just to feel accepted and loved within in a concrete environment. You can watch the struggle he has mentally as to understand the differences he feels with his emotions at home and at school. With his wrong choices, he lies to himself and to me because deep down he feels ashamed, and he wants connection. I feel frustration because until now I did not understand how the same person can act in two extreme ways. Who is he trying to get the connection with, by this bad behaviour? Is it with me, his dads or is it really a cry of help to learn how to connect with himself?
How do you teach a child that you love that he is the person that holds the key to his own happiness? That if he loves himself, connects with his heart, accept himself and let go of the fear then he will be happy, his journey will be fulfilled, and he can achieve anything he wants to do?
Scientific Evidence to support self love and connection has a positive impact.
Not just taking my knowledge and experience, I wondered if there was any scientific evidence that self-love and connection could have a positive impact on your mental health, self-esteem, and overall life satisfaction.
A definition shared: Self love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others”.
Standford Medicine reviewed scientific data and it showed self-criticism makes us weaker in the fear of failure. Yet self-compassion leads to self-kindness, understanding we are not alone, reduction in stress and boosting of endorphins.
Psychology today equally found similar findings and that self-connection and love led to increase in strength and performance, increase in productivity, and reduction in stress.
Yet where do you start? Can you do it on your own or need support? Understanding that this is a fearful time, you are safe to ask for help and maybe coaching is an option to explore
Considerations
Some considerations you may want to explore:
1. Acknowledgement of your self and noticing if you are experiencing suffering and showing yourself compassion.
2. Be conscious of any negative self-talk towards yourself. How does it make you feel inside? Where is it feeling in your body?
3. Set boundaries – It is hard to love yourself when people around you do not support you or value you.
4. Make space for self-reflection – things don’t go according to plan, but that does not mean you are a failure, it is an opportunity to grow and learn about you.
5. Try 5-minute heart meditation to calm your mind and allow you just time to be with you.
Final Words
Is you are a unique individual and nothing is certain in life, but you have nothing to lose, release, connect with yourself and you never know what greatness lies ahead.
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